How to Make Love to Your Wife

*Suggestion Success: How To Raise New Sexual Subjects With Your Woman*

By John Alexander

It's important to do new things sexually with your wife or girlfriend because it keeps the sex interesting over the long run.

While men like routine, women often crave variety in the bedroom. So doing the same thing all the time will not only make sex a less frequent event, but it will also make your woman's attraction for you wither away.

The risk you face, however, is that your woman might say "no." This is a danger because psychologically, when a person says no to something, it puts them into a more negative frame of mind toward that subject in general. And you definitely don't want your woman to feel any negativity when it comes to sex!

So, with that in mind, here are the six 6 proven-to-work ways of talking to your woman about sexual experimentation, which all work because she will be at her most open-minded...

*1. Get used to talking about sex /after/ you've had it.*

If you don't normally talk about sex with your woman, it will be weird to her if you all of a sudden start telling her your deepest fantasies.

The perfect time to introduce sex talk is when you're both in the post-coital afterglow. At that point it's the easiest to do. You two are both completely relaxed, in love and free of any inhibitions, and it makes sense to whisper to her things like, "That felt so good when you..."

She'll feel free to share her thoughts with you as well.

Once you're talking about sex so openly, it will be simple to plant seeds in her mind about "something we could try sometime." So make it a habit to always talk about lovemaking when you're basking in the post-orgasm recovery phase.

*2. Handwritten notes.*

Leave handwritten sexy notes hidden where you know your woman will find them. Your notes will explain in erotic detail all of the things you want to do with her, while adding something new you want to try.

Use subtle wording with your suggestion and be classy. For example, let's say you want your woman to play with herself while you watch. So, at the right time in your note, say something like, "As I watch your naked body glistening in the moonlight, you touch yourself in front of me."

It's important to make sure your note is handwritten on paper -- since for women that has 100 times more impact than something emailed or printed off.

*3. Develop an interest in photographic art books.*

Get an artistic book with classy sex pictures (not porn). Go through the book together and talk about each picture. It just takes one photo to spark a conversation about the new sexual act you want.

*4. Do some secret gardening.*

Required reading for any man serious about understanding the female sex drive is My Secret Garden by Nancy Friday. Written in the 1970s (but every bit as relevant today), it is an honest expose of the type of secret fantasies almost all women have but repress within themselves.

Get a copy of the book and read it with your girlfriend or wife.

Here's how to use My Secret Garden to get her to try something new: take turns reading passages to each other and talk about what you just read.

The book literally does all the work for you of bringing up new ideas, since the passage you read can "just happen" to be about the new sex act you want to try.

*5. Use Bookmarking.*

Joan Elizabeth Lloyd, author of Nice Couples Do, discovered an extremely effective technique to communicate new sexual ideas to your partner, which she calls Bookmarking. You simply leave a book of sexy fiction in a place where your woman will find it, and have a bookmark at the page you want her to read.

(The book Nice Couples Do actually works great using Lloyd's Bookmarking Method, since it's full of a wide variety of quick-to-read erotic stories.)

*6. Bring it up when she's extremely aroused.*

This one may sound like common sense, but success depends on your delivery. When it's the right time, just say "Let's ____," "I'm going to _____," or "I want you to _____."

The key, however, is your delivery and her emotional state. Emotionally, she must be at her maximum arousal point. Women usually hit this point during cunnilingus.

Your delivery must be confident and direct, yet playful and "naughty." Society conditions women to feel guilty about sex, so it's up to you as the man to take 100% of the responsibility for everything the two of you do in the bedroom.

That way, with you taking the lead, the woman can relax and enjoy the brand new sensations you'll give her, guilt-free.

John Alexander is author of How To Be Her Best Lover Ever, a groundbreaking sex guide for men that will make you so good in bed your woman will beg you for more.