Tips How to Build Self Confidence

It is just maddening... how so many people want to know how to build self confidence. It is easier said that done as many of you found out.

Some of you went to the library and grabbed a couple of books... others may have rented tapes...

Either way, you found out that you are just not as committed to follow through and fell back into your old ways... and now you are having second thoughts about that.

Did I hit the hammer on the nail with you?

Here's the thing, self confidence is just the ability of you trusting that you will do the right thing every time. For instance, approaching an attractive member of the opposite sex (MOTOS) and carrying an interesting conversation.

And hopefully, walking away with her/his contact number.

But like I said, it is easier said than done. Most of us... especially the guys... are mortally petrified to actually approach a woman we are interested in and ask her out. In fact, they say that over 50% of the marriages happen when the couple met at work.

And only 2% or less was when a guy asked a woman out in public.

I'm not surprised... it is all about our culture... how it programmed guys to pretty much behave like a woman. Not a pleasant thought, right guys?

Think about it... how interesting can you be to a woman if you act like a female? Not very, I bet. So that means if you stammer, sweat or lose your thoughts when approaching a woman... or even... NEVER approaching her...

Well, like they say about putting the golf ball toward the hole... you want to aim about 1 foot beyond the hole because you have a chance everytime you putt the ball. But if you hit the ball to lightly, your chances of getting the ball in the whole is... 0%!

So not even asking an attractive woman that you see on the streets for her phone number is like batting zero. You my friend, will NEVER, EVER socialize with her.

And why? Well, you are scared that she is going to reject you. And the funny thing is... all this time the girls are thinking that guys are NOT interested in them... it never occured to them that the guy is actually scared to death to approach her.

And guess what guys? Girls aren't so scary. Sure, they can say "No" to you... but so what? You actually tried.

So back to self confidence... here's what you can do. Get a journal... write down every single time during the day when you did something positive. Something positive happened to you.

And at the end of the day, read what you wrote down. I'm betting you are going to see a lot of little victories. And you can give yourself a pat on the back for that.

But the beauty of this journal thing is that you get to focus on replicating success. And continuous success means... more self confidence.

So do positive things during the day. It can be anything from holding the door open for a older woman to reading self help books on investing or whatever you think you need to get better at.

Write it down. Do it in baby steps.

And then, try to get a little more ambitious and start planning things. Like a vacation. Save money for it. Research where you would like to go. When is the best time to go to your vacation spot and what you would like to do when you get there.

It is all about taking little baby steps.

And sooner than later, you are going to notice that hey, you can do stuff too.

And if you need a little help talking with women... I can recommend that you get Conversation Chemistry. I have this ebook and I read it all the time. It is chock full of interesting observations about human communications and why men and women miss the boat. Conversation Chemistry can help you maximize the feeling of connection when you meet a MOTOS for the first date so that you can get a second one.

It isn't just you... most guys don't know what the heck to say to a woman... even the ones that got divorced or left a long term relationship... it is really hard to talk to a new person. In such a way that they feel comfortable with you too.

So get the book. I highly recommend it.

Good luck discovering how to build self confidence in yourself,

John Garret
Author of moderndatingsite.com

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